me life again to-day. I have freed myself from error. I have come to know my master.
"I used to say that there was going on in my body, in the body of this grass, in the body of this beetle,"—the beetle did not want to go to the other stalk, but spread its wings, and flew away,—"incessant change of matter, in conformity to certain physical, chemical, and physiological laws; and in all of us, together with the aspens and the clouds, and the nebulae, there was evolution. Evolution from what? into what? Endless evolution and conflict.—But was conflict with the Infinite possible? And I was surprised to find nothing along this line, in spite of my best efforts, which could reveal to me the meaning of my life, my motives, my longings. But the consciousness that there is a meaning is, nevertheless, so strong and clear, that it forms the very foundation of my existence; and I marveled and rejoiced when the muzhik said, 'To live for God, for the soul.'
"Now I can say that I know the meaning of life: it is to live for God, for my own soul. And this meaning, in spite of its clearness, is mysterious and miraculous. And such is the meaning of all existence. Yes, there is pride," said he to himself, turning over on his stomach and beginning to tie into a knot the stalks of grass, while trying not to break them. "Not only pride of intellect, but the stupidity of intellect. Yes, it is the wickedness of intellect," he repeated.
He succinctly went over in memory the course of his thought for the last two years, from the day when the idea of death struck him, on seeing his beloved brother hopelessly sick.
Then he had clearly resolved that, since man had no other prospect than suffering, death, and eternal oblivion, he must either commit suicide, or find the explanation of the problem of existence, and in such manner as to see in it something more than the cruel irony of a malevolent spirit.
But he had not done either, but continued to live, to think, and to feel. He had married, and had experienced
